And I'm Home...

Sorry I haven't posted in a while.

I have moved in to James place.. "our place" and have kicked him out, so I can take over and put my 'fingerprint' on everything.
Poor boy has gone to live with his parents for the remaining 4 weeks. (yes thats right people, 4 WEEKS)
It's good though, in a difficult kind of way, him not being here.
 I want to make it feel like MY home here.
I really didn't want to feel like I was moving me and Roo (and now it's only me and Roo) into this other person's house with it's pre existing history...
I realise thats exactly what I am doing, but I am using this time to settle in with Roo, and make it ours as much as James's and his kids.
It'll take time to make it feel like I own a part of it (maybe that feeling will come more once we are married) But for now, I'll just keep trying to put my touch on it. :)

I don't have much else to say..
I have 4 weeks to go, sorry 'we' have 4 weeks to go and what feels like not enough time.

I won't even get to try hens night pole dancing!! (don't worry nan, it's not what it sounds like)
Mostly because of lack of time, and also because the place fell down in the earthquake, along with most of my other favourite places in ChCh.

I am a vow writing, cup making, ring buying, food discussing, car fixing, honeymoon planning, making up trialling, shoe picking,table painting bride to be and it takes time!!!

And that is only about a quarter of it!
{Oh yeah.. and I moved house.}

and lost my kitty :( 

But I have loved it.
It's a wedding with a really personal touch.  It feels like MY wedding.
Crap. Sorry honey, our wedding.
Not that I want to blow my own horn.
It's been possible because of all the people I've known along the way..

I can't wait to show you pictures of it all!!!!

Right.
Over and Out.

Sometimes I actually get scared that because I love you so much, you will disappear... 

My current favourite song. Suits my blog :)

A trial run....

For those of you who can't come...

here is a sneak peak at what the decor will look like......

It's all reloved stuff. Borrowed, bought second hand and repainted or acquired along the way, for almost ziltch.

I'm fully proud.

HA!!
What a long time between posts!
I would appologise, but really, noone reads this!
- ok except maybe you Nan :)

It's 9 1/2 weeks to go till I am officially a Mrs Robinson.
Here's hoping the old one goes back to her maiden name hahum

Yes I am an attention seeker.

I found this picture on facebook.
It's me and widge and stina about 4 years ago.
Nothing has changed. (between US that is.... )
Well, except that we don't see each other nearly as much since we realised we all had to go to work and be endlessly busy...
It sucks, but it's life.
And, lets face it, we can now AFFORD to go to nice places to catch up over dinner and booze.
Well, dinner at least ;)

So, it's the new year.
Thankyou God that 2011 is over
with your stupid quakes, and ex bollucks, and more ex bollucks, and kid bollucks...
Bring on the newness.
The time for renewal.
A time to reflect.
(I'm plagiarizing an amazing sermon I heard on Sunday...)

So.
I will be a bride in 9 1/2 weeks. 
Am I scared?
Maybe a little.
Nervous would probably be a better word for it.
But excited?
For damn sure.

Here we are!

Sorry it's been a while.
Again.

Pop went to hospital to have a tonsillectomy.
We prayed that she wouldn't have to wait all day..
She was first on the list, was in and out by 9.25am

We prayed she'd get over it fast
She's home, and wants to go to school.
It feels like He's been listening :)

Blood pressure

Texting before going in

Beautiful Room...

Ready for surgery

Just like on Grey's... gimmee an elevator...

Doing a scrub in dance

A little more nervous, hooked up 

The waiting room.  Tried not to cry..

Recovery... 

Leaving for the night.... That was hard to do, but she was falling asleep, and wanted me to go... bless

Home time... 

Untitled

Remarkable
The little things
You forget
and can't get back

The little things
you may never have wanted
The way you talked
with your whole body

Still
You still do
And
Won't look back
much at all
today, or tomorrow

For It happened
and happened
and now

You are no longer the child
facing life
on a rope

Just let go
the river is calm
And so cool

Today
didn't really mean
anything
did it

Progress...

I had all of the kids this past weekend.

I was nervous, as things don't always work out when all 3 are together.

To add to that, we were staying at James's the weekend.. kids in tow, nerves in hand. 

(can you have 'nerves in hand?') 

But by the Grace of God (and the help of  a Polish professional) 

things seemed (and still seem) to be looking up...

I am presently working on my habitual negativity and sarcasm in front of said 'issue' child.

Ok, that was actually probably a fail right there!

I overheard a small convo between James and child, that they didn't know I was privy to, and I welled up with gratitude..

To see the changes happening, little by little, (although I am terrified of repeat episodes)

is remarkable, and not without much thanksgiving.

I pray this is long term

I so desperately want him back for good. 

So I just have to keep plugging away at me, 

as this seems to be the thing that is changing it. 

The weekend:

I was spost to go swimming with the dolphins on saturday in Akaroa, about an hour and a half out of CHC... but the weather was against us...
So we canned it, and will do it on our honeymoon instead. 

On the way back we stopped to enjoy what a southerly does to the water at Birdlings Flat. It's extremely dangerous, and you can't swim in it, but its fun to play...

Magical Birdlings flat traffic

He bought me roadside Peonies! LOVE!

Selwyn huts, where we will take photos at the wedding..

Miss Pop 

Having fun with Roo