FINALLY an ADULT...

Wish I could remember where I stole this pic from. Was it you Widge? 

It's my 30th on Tuesday.

30.

I have been alive and kicking (sometimes rather hard) for 30 years.

I still feel stuck at about 23 (stuck? or happily placed..) 

30 actually sounds like an adult doesn't it.

Like, it's not QUITE as hot for James to say "my fiance is 30." It was much better when he could say "my fiance is 29" as it still sounds like you probably haven't had kids, (ahem, even though I had 3 by the time I was 20) you probably have started to think about a career for your self... you probably still have the 'features' of a late 20's body.. 

But 30.... 

Anyway, it's a pointless post, as I have always looked forward to my 30's.

I've never been scared of aging ( I say that now...) 

With age comes confidence, responsibility for your own feelings thoughts and decisions, and a sense of satisfaction seems a lot easier to grasp at. 

I was going to have a big party for it, 

but seeing as it's 17 weeks until I get MARRIED I thought I'd rather just put the effort into preparing for that instead. 

I'm really just posting this so that it's been said. 

And so I can look back and see how I felt about it...

I think, right now, I feel pretty good. 

O and O xxx

Holiday slides

Hello My lovelies.
James and I managed to escape to gorgeous Southport (Gold coast) for labour weekend.
(Thanks Mama T!)
We got to see the beaches, the babes, get brown, (get burnt)
It was fabulous.

Here are the photos!
 And yes. I am posing. Because I felt that I COULD.
Aussie does that to me.....

No, we didn't stay here, just took a photo coz our one in CHC is now on an iconic lean.... 

We had a busy weekend..
Roo turned 9 today (the 16th)
He's my baby.
I feel fine, but he will just have to tolerate the fact that no matter how old he gets, I will always want to pick him up and rock him.
Oh long may it last that he still wants to kiss me ON THE LIPS.

Roo age 3 or 4

Hehe.
I am such a physical- touch- as- my- love- language- person.
Which is good, as so is James.
Or maybe thats new for me...
I don't remember ever being a physical touch person... I was always an 'acts-of-service-as-my-love-language" person....

Hmmmmm.... maybe it's all about the one you love...

ANYWAY.

I actually wanted to have a moan about how HARD it is to come home every second Sunday...
It's part of the routine.
I stay with the kids at James's on the alternate weekend (ie, when we HAVE all the kids)
then take them home Sunday evening and start the "week where I don't see him till Wednesday"
Ok, so I know that you may be gagging, as it sounds like I'm 13 years old,

This is the beautiful place that I love... the bluebells by the river....

BUT...... we've been together for just over 18 months and I still miss him on Sundays. (and Mondays and Tuesdays...)

Thats good right?

Date night

I've never actually had that before, so I'm just saying....

Like, I actually feel low, and cruddy and irritable and missyish and I hate it!
I can't WAIT to be married so we can live together and cuddle and kiss (gag ? yuuus!) and blob out and fix up the damn cars (my mini is looking sad and unloved) and go to bed at a normal hour so that we don't feel like we are wasting time units by SLEEPING instead of talking....

I look forward to marriage.
I look forward to being tied together with my best friend, for life.
I look forward to actually being able to go "hi, this is my HUSBAND James" instead of something mumbly and rubbish like "hi, this is my boyfriend, partner fiance type person, James"
Semantics? I think not....

It's 4 months and 3 weeks to go.
- At some point I was going to tone up and look fabulous (ok, MORE fabulous, I look pretty good for 3 kids and nearly 30) - (this is me doing positive affirmations)
There is no tick box for *Tone up and make your butt sing* in the to do lists for the wedding....

Better see about that....

.

Oh, we went to the zoo for Roo's 9th birthday, it was so much fun.

To be fair, I'd probably go there without kids too, I really like the zoo...

Feeding the lions ;-)

You wait for this trained pig to open it's mouth and then you drop a piece of fruit or vege in there.
It is the grossest thing. Really. 

Roo was freaked out by the girraffe! This is his step bro to be 'Boo', feeding it a branch

Pop and Boo

Over and Out.

School Holiday Fun

The kids and I have two days together in the school holidays.
One Thursday a week.
So I wanted to do something fun...

Pop had been trying dissection at school.
Sheep hearts, and she LOVED it.
(Go figure, my vegetarian wanna be daughter who feels sorry for flies and spiders when they get killed...)

So... after much searching we managed to track down some hearts (and kidneys)
And some special knives
And some sciency looking tweezers
And they got to work.
It was Rad.

Not as cheap as you'd think, but I know that they will want to do it again, so I was ok about it...
I reckon it's pretty cool.
Felt really proud of my little weirdo's today :)

I found it really fascinating watching the kids do this. They sat side by side at the kitchen bench (which got a thorough cleaning!)  And they really enjoyed it.  They were both really cooperative, it was great!

A month later:

The most beautiful place in Christchurch (this is a bad example) The bluebells under the spring trees, right in the center of town...

Wow.
Ok, so it's a little long since I blogged.
If you think thats bad, you should see my journal. I could probably keep using the same one for the next 3 years and I still wouldn't finish it...
Part of me thinks thats a little sad, as I was such a 'journal-er' But on thinking about it, I guess it's just another one of those things that has altered over time, changed as I have grown up...

I have kept one since I was 9 or so, every year. Mostly to whine about how  I perceived my situation to be.
A release of energy, of emotion, of pent up frustration...
Now I just take it out on the kids instead...       Joking. 

I think it's something to do (or at least I aspire for this to be the reason) with the fact that I am more in the now. I'm trying to deal with stuff that comes up as it happens, not 5 hours later with my head in a diary, and a pen furiously writing away the anger/guilt/sadness/overwhelmy feelings...

Even blog was never spost to be about an audience (how many times have we said that to ourselves)

I didn't even sit down to write this!
Was going to say, that my job has been going well.
I have team mates.
I am learning that there are definitely people I work better with.
I have re-learnt that I still get on better with guys in general than girls in a workplace. (study place, etc)
I have a teensy tiny, but oh so regular paycheck to count on every week.

And all of that feels good.
There was a moment yesterday when I thought : Oh crap, this is forever... I work everyday... I feel trapped.... 
And then I pulled myself together and told myself that I was being paid for it, and it was filling my days... and that is what I wanted.
Christmas holidays are a whole different row of ducks that are as of yet to be lined up, but.....
I am not freaking out.
yet. 


So thats been my month.
New Job.
New responsibilities.
Learning, and trying to pray for those around me who need a break, who need a load taken off their shoulders.
Gosh, thats actually a whole post of its own...

I'll try to put proverbial pen to paper before the next month ends....

Over and Out xx